Playboys of the Southwestern World
by elin2002
Summary: Roger remembers him and Collins growing up.


_**(I don't own RENT or Blake Shelton's song Playboys of the Southwestern World. I just borrowed them for my own sick pleasure.)**_

Roger came out of his room carrying his guitar, and sat down on the broke down old couch. He wanted to write a song. All he could think of was an old box of pictures his mother had sent him. He found it funny that when the box came, Mimi was shocked when she saw the return address.

"Hey, Roger you have a package from Rancho, TX?" Space said Mimi.

"Cool."

"Who do you know in Texas?"

"My parents." He said simply.

"Oh that's cool that they moved somewhere warmer when you moved out."

"What are you talking about they've lived in the same house since I was two."

"What?" She asked. "Wait your from Texas?"

"Yeah, where do you think I was from?"

"I don't know I thought you and Mark grew up together."

"No Collins and I did."

"Wow you learn something new every day." Said Mimi. "Well I'm off to work. I'll see you later Babe."

"Bye."

He sat down and started strumming out of tune that sounded a lot different to what he usually played but he liked the difference. He had a notebook in front of him and jotted down lyrics as they came to him. He thought about different memories he had of him and Collins growing up.

**(Flashback)**

Julia Collins is watching her three-year-old son play with his blocks in their living room when she saw moving truck two houses down with a family that had a little boy who looked to be the same age as her son Tommy.

"Tommy let's go and say hi to our new neighbors."

"Okay Mama"

Julia grabbed the cookies she had made earlier in the day, and took Tommy down the street.

"I am Julia Collins and this is my son Tommy. I saw the truck and decided to come down and walking the guys to the neighborhood."

"Well thank you I'm Kathryn Davis that's my husband Joe and our son Roger."

"He is a sweetheart, how old is he?"

"How old are you? Can you tell Mrs. Collins?" Asked Kathryn to Roger.

"I'm this many." Said Roger holding up two fingers.

"Really well Tommy is three. Maybe when you guys get settled we can set up a play date."

"That would be great we don't know anyone around here."

"Where you guys from?" Asked Julia.

"Fort Worth, Joe found a better job nearby so we packed up and moved."

Roger and Collins from that day on and became partners in crime constantly getting into trouble when they started school trouble now included other kids when the teachers are principle called first question asked was _'what did they do now?'_

When the boys were 14 and 15 they decided to pull a prank other class they went in early and removed all the furniture and put it in the gym with the exact setup had in the classroom the teacher arrived in her room was empty completely void of students and staff she searched all around before going into the principal's office and reporting her home were missing.

"What do you mean your room is missing 20 students?" Asked Mr. Kennedy

"I don't know came in and put my stuff down everything was there went to and got my coffee came back about 45 minutes later everything is gone and they never showed up."

"Okay I'll make an announcement attention would Mrs. Grey's homeroom please let us know where you are."

The custodian was walking by the gym when he heard laughter he looked in and saw the class in question he smiled when he saw Tom and Roger at the front taking what looked like attendance he turned and walked down to the office.

"Mr. Kennedy I found kids you are looking for." Said Mr. Stuart smiling to himself.

"Where did you find them?" Asked Mrs. Grey.

"All your stuff and students are in the gym."

"Do you know who was responsible?" Mrs. Grey asked.

"Oh this is definitely a Collins/Davis show." Said Mr. Kennedy.

"Mr. Kennedy we don't know for sure it was them..." Suggested Mrs. Grey.

"It was them this is great and I will prove it." He said storm and out towards the gym when he got there he saw the boys handed out papers. "Just what in the world is going on here!"

"We are having homeroom." Said Roger.

"Homeroom is to be held in an actual classroom Mr. Davis."

"Technically we are in a classroom, Mr. Kennedy as we have gym_ 'class'_ in here." Said Collins.

"The kids have a point." Said Mr. Stuart who had a soft spot for Collins and Roger.

"Move all of the furniture and items back to room 116! Now!" Yelled Mr. Kennedy.

"Of course Mr. Kennedy how could you do me a favor dropped us off with Mrs. Gall You know so we all get credit for today." Asked Roger with a smile.

"Davis! My office now!"

"Fine, I'll bring it myself. You guys okay getting this stuff back?"

"Yeah, go I'll catch up to you later."

"Actually Mr. Collins you'll catch up now. Kids go to your homeroom. Leave everything where it is." Said Mr. Kennedy.

About an hour later both Roger and Collins' parents arrived at the school.

"They strike again." Said Joe with a laugh.

"When are they going to learn?" Asked Derek returning Joe's smile.

"When you two stop encouraging them." Said Julia.

"Hey Jacie." Said Kathryn to Mrs. Gall the head secretary.

"Hey guys, they are right in there." She said with a smile as she walked over to the door and knocked.

"Enter!"

"Mr. Kennedy the boys' parents are here."

"Send them in."

"Hey guys." Said Joe with a smile.

"Hi Dad." Said Roger.

"You guys couldn't have at least made it past homeroom today?" Asked Julia.

"No, gym class would have been boring we're still learning the rules to dodge ball." Said Collins.

"There's rules to dodge ball?" Asked Derek.

"Yup, apparently duck and cover is too hard for people." Said Roger.

"Can we get back to the issue at hand?" Asked Mr. Kennedy annoyed.

"What is the issue Mr. Kennedy?" Asked Joe.

"Maybe we should have the boys show you follow me."

The families followed Mr. Kennedy down to the gym.

"That is the issue Mr. Davis."

"Nice job Boys…" Said Joe as Kathryn looked at him. "I mean bad boys how could you do that?"

"Not convincing enough Joe." Said Kathryn shaking her head.

"It was actually easy we just got here early and waited until she went to get coffee and moved it all." Said Roger amazed they pulled it off.

"They are suspended." Said Mr. Kennedy.

"Please don't suspend them, cause then they'll be hanging around my house wreaking havoc keep them in school with detention please." Said Julia with a smile.

"Suspension effective immediately. And that's final."

"How long?"

"Three days."

"Cool vacation." Said Collins.

"Excuse me." Said Julia.

"I mean that sucks."

"Let's go get your stuff." Said Derek.

"What about the clean up, they need to clean this mess up." Said Mr. Kennedy.

"You said it yourself they're suspended effective immediately."

"But…"

"Let's go boys." Said Julia.

"Yes ma'am. Did you see his head I thought he was going to explode." Said Roger with a smile.

The boys' punishment flew by quickly and much to Julia and Kathryn's pleasure the boys went back to school and had only a few run-ins with the principal. During their last three years of high school they only pulled a few pranks each year that didn't result in much more than suspensions.

In January of their senior year the boys found out they were given full scholarships to Mt. St. Mary's College much to the surprise of all the parents and Mr. Kennedy.

One night in October Roger way lying in bed waiting for his girlfriend of the week to show up when he heard a quick knock and then the door burst open.

"Oh geeze." Said Roger not at all surprised at the fact Collins was standing there with nothing on but a sombrero and cowboy boots. "Will you put some pants on please?"

"Hey Romeo, I want to take a trip."

"It looks like you already are on a trip; get your naked ass off my bed."

"No I'm serious Dad sent me some money, let's go to Mexico and pick up some senoritas."

"You do realize you're gay right?" Said Roger not moving from his spot in bed.

"Fine I'll channel all my energy in finding you a girl."

"I've got one coming over in 5 minutes, but fine I'll go as soon as you go put some pants on. You so owe me drinks and breakfast Kendra was going to come over so yeah you really owe me."

"Deal lets go Romeo."

"Jackass." Said Roger with a smile as he got out of bed.

The boys got into Collins' ancient truck and headed towards the border. They didn't really make it to Mexico though. It was a random search that they got pulled into. During the search they found what was left of the cash that Collins' dad sent him and the pot Collins had left over.

"You know if we get busted the Dads are going to actually kill us." Said Roger quietly.

"Don't worry we'll be fine."

"Doin' funny business in Mexico Amigos?"

Roger had a grand total of two seconds to answer.

"It's all his, now please let me go." Said Roger as Collins shot him a surprised look from the driver's seat.

"Well it was your idea Genius; I was comfortable in bed waiting for Kendra to come over. Plus it was the only way to get you to put your clothes on."

"You know we could get 10 years." Said Collins.

"Sucks to be you. I'll come visit." Said Roger with a smile.

"Go get out of here." Said the guard.

**(End of Flashback)**

Roger leaned back on the couch and smiled at the fact he finished a song. Everyone came over after work, and kept at him to let them listen to it.

"No Maureen."

"Come on Rog, I'll give you a lap dance."

"Yeah, doesn't have the same effect when my girlfriend does it for a living." Said Roger with a smile.

"Fine don't tell us. I'll find out later."

"Yeah when I sing it tomorrow night."

"Ugh, you suck." Everyone laughed and left him alone about it.

The next night Roger played through his usual crazy mixture set and then he sat down on the stool he brought up.

"Okay, I'm going to slow it down a bit, kind of. Actually I'm going to play something different from my usual sound. And just so you know names have been changed to protect the guilty parties **fake cough** Tom Collins. Sorry I don't know where that came from." Everyone in the crowd laughed and those who knew Collins all looked at him. And he just shrugged.

_This is a song  
About best friends_

John Roy  
Was a boy I knew  
Since he was three  
And I was two  
Grew up two little houses  
Down from me

The only two bad apples  
On our family tree  
Kind of ripened and rotted  
In our puberty  
Two kindred spirits bound by destiny

Well now I was smart  
But I lacked ambition  
Johnny was wild  
With no inhibition  
Was about like mixin  
Fire and gasoline  
(And he'd say)

Hey Romeo  
Let's go down to Mexico  
Chase senoritas  
Drink ourselves silly  
Show them Mexican girls  
A couple of real hillbillies  
Got a pocket full of cash  
And that old Ford truck  
A fuzzy cat hangin  
From the mirror for luck  
Said don't you know  
All those little  
Brown-eyed girls  
Want playboys of the southwestern world

Long around  
Our eighteenth year  
We found two plane tickets  
The hell out of here  
Got scholarships  
To some small town  
School in Texas

Learned to drink Sangria  
Til the dawns early light  
Eat eggs Ranchero  
And throw up all night  
And tell those daddy's girls  
We were majoring in a rodeo

Ah but my  
Favorite memory  
At school that fall  
Was the night John Roy  
Came runnin down the hall  
Wearin nothin  
But cowboy boots  
And a big sombrero  
(And he was yellin)

Hey Romeo  
Let's go down to Mexico  
Chase senoritas  
Drink ourselves silly  
Show them Mexican girls  
A couple of real hillbillies  
Got a pocket full of cash  
And that old Ford truck  
A fuzzy cat hangin  
From the mirror for luck  
Said don't you know  
All those little  
Brown-eyed girls  
Want playboys of the southwestern world

And I said  
We had a little  
Change in plans  
Like when Paul McCartney  
Got busted in Japan  
And I said  
We got waylaid  
When we laid foot  
On Mexican soil  
See the border guard  
With the Fu Manchu mustache  
Kind of stumbled on John's  
Pocket full of American cash  
He said  
Doin a little funny business  
In Mexico Amigo

But all I could think about  
Was savin my own tail  
When he mentioned ten years  
In a Mexican jail  
So I pointed to John Roy and said  
It's all his now please let me go  
Well it was your idea genius  
I was just layin there in bed  
When you said

Hey Romeo  
Let's go down to Mexico  
Chase senoritas  
Drink ourselves silly  
Show them Mexican girls  
A couple of real hillbillies  
Got a pocket full of cash  
And that old Ford truck  
A fuzzy cat hangin  
From the mirror for luck  
Said don't you know  
All those little  
Brown-eyed girls  
Want playboys of the southwestern world

Ah we're still best friends  
Temporary cell mates

"Thanks guys, I'll see you next time." Said Roger after he finished the song. He then joined his friends at the table.

"So how much of that was true?" Asked Joanne with a laugh.

"All of it…None of it." Said Roger and Collins at the same time.

"Don't lie. You know it's true." Said Roger taking a sip of his beer. "I'm the one who has nightmares about cowboy boots and sombreros coming at me."

"Oh poor Baby." Said Mimi.

"So what did your parents all say when you guys got stopped?" Asked Angel.

"Nothing they still don't know." Said Roger.

"How did you manage to keep that from them?" Asked Mark knowing how close Roger was now with his parents.

"They were more concerned with the steady stream of women leaving my dorm room." Said Roger.

"Some things never change." Said Maureen into her glass.

"You have no room to talk there little girl." Said Collins. "I can't believe you wrote a song about us Romeo."

"You bet your bare ass I did."


End file.
